Have u seen your kids losing his/her temper ? Have you ever wondered why do they express their dissatisfaction in such an fury way ?
May they be elder or younger everyone gets anger or you can call it as 'losing ones's coolness'.
Recently , my son and myself were discussing about his activities in his school . He told, he was having a workshop of how to handle bulling and what to do when u get upset and frustrated when bullied . I would like to share it with you all .
What is Anger ?
Anger is an emotion or a feeling ,characterized by antagonism toward someone or something you feel has deliberately done you wrong. It can give you a way to express negative feelings or motivate you to find solutions to problems. But excessive anger can cause problems.
Anger issues can other wise be called as wrath, rage, fury, passion, choler, temper, bad or ill temper, ire, indignation, acrimony, animosity, hostility, hatred, resentment, outrage, vengeful passion, revengeful passion, hot temper, irascibility, displeasure, irritation, impatience, vexation, annoyance,.....etc.
What makes kids angry ?
Kids may get angry when something doesn't go their way. Maybe they get mad at themselves when they don't understand their homework . When their team loses an important game. When they have a hard time reaching a goal. Frustration can lead to anger.
Kids who tease other kids or call by names can make them angry. Kids often get angry with their parents thinking that putting rules is unfair. Worst of all is when they are blamed for something they didn't do.
What happens when your kids are angry?
Your heart speeds up
Your muscles feel tight
You might feel shaky or sick in your tummy
You might feel like crying
You might feel like yelling
You might feel like hurting someone
Understanding a kid about his\her situation is more important being a parent. We can help the child not only by understading the situation, but by teaching them few of the following steps .
The 'I' message
Star fish breathing
Ballon breathing
The magical word
THE 'I' MESSAGE
What is 'I' MESSAGE ? I-statement or message is an assertion about the feelings, beliefs, values, etc. of the person speaking, generally expressed by them . We should teach the child how to express their views and feeling through the 'I'message like , ' I feel.....', ' I would like to .....', etc.
Allow them to explain how they feel or what happened or what they are in need .
STAR FISH BREATHING
Star fish breathing is a breathing excise using your hand . Teach the kids how to control the frustration using this excise. Bellow is the image for Star fish breath.
BALLOON BREATHING
Think your belly as a balloon. Put your hands on your belly and feel it to rise and fall when you take deep breath inside and out.
Take a deep breath through your nose, hold it for 2 seconds and leave it out through your mouth slowly like deflating the balloon.
THE MAGICAL WORD
"Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much." The magical word is DOING TOGETHER. We as parents should learn to use the word together frequently with the kids .
Every kid needs that secured feeling where they can express what they feel . To make them comfortable , we should frequently talk with them saying ,"We can do it together...". This gives them strong statement that you are beside them and understand their situations.
Allow your kids to talk , allow them to share whats going on in and around their environment and more importantly have patiences to listen to what they say.